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6.22.2006

i know you know i want to know how i feel 

a lot has been going on.

the ultimate understatement you have yet to see. er. read.

for starters, my apologies that it’s been nearly a month since i last wrote. every time over the last four weeks that i have gone to start a new post, something either comes up or i pass out. it’s been an interesting month, no doubt, with lots of stuff going on that i could have written about. basically i am forcing myself to hold to publishing at least *this* post, so that there is *something* on my site for people to read. that is, if there is anybody still checking my site. i know monica and a couple other people at least have been asking what the fizzy is the dizzy, so here it is.

in short:

ashley is out. apparently. even though she never really did say anything to me to that effect, it became fairly evident that something was amiss when two months passed by and i got no response from her, despite the repeated e-mails and calls i had sent in her direction. a couple weeks ago, spring’s diligent sleuthing uncovered the profile of another guy on myspace in ashley’s home town to which she had been sending many lovey-dovey comments and messages.

so, whatever.

i didn’t take the news all that hard. as i had mused on when i finally realized things were pretty much over, the long distance factor in that whole relationship pretty much had cast a dark spell over things for the most part anyways. while i was definitely into her when she came out to visit, as time passed after she returned home, it just didn’t seem like things were entirely on the level. eventually it just became a given that the whole situation was done and over with.

which is terrific, because it allowed me to pursue the latest woman in my life – meagan (pronounced "meegin"). she is a phenomenally talented artist and a budding filmmaker taking film courses up in the city (you can check out her material at DoomGirlMeg). much more local, and definitely a wonderful companion to be with. hanging out with her is a total joy, and the relationship seems to be going quite well so far.

we met at fanimecon last month, when masato asked if i would assist him in figuring out the artist row stuff (he was in charge of the artist vendor room), as well as got me a media badge so that i could run around the convention for the entire weekend with loads of cameras strapped to me, taking pictures and video of practically everything at the event.

meagan and her good friend cassy were seated at the table across from us in the artist alley, and over time we all got to know each other and become good friends. the girls had a rather large printer/copier/scanner/hybrid behemoth peripheral (ironically, the same model my dad just recently bought), so masato and i offered the use of our cart to haul their gear up and back from their hotel room to the convention center. when meagan got home from the show, she went online to check out my availability on myspace, and was bummed to see that i was still listed as "in a relationship," even though it had been a couple weeks since i had finally decided that ashley probably was through with me.

a week later, after chatting online and text messaging on our phones, she and i began dating. it started off with an afternoon in a park down in santa cruz, and went onward from there. now we see each other every other day, either up in the city or her coming down and hanging out with me, masato, and stacy, a girl that masato is currently pursuing.

which brings us to now. meagan will be coming over later tonight after i get off work to hang out and watch movies, and i’ve spent several nights staying in her dorm room up in the city. which is also how my car ended up getting towed yesterday.

apparently i was parked in a "trucks only" meter spot, and so while she and i were snuggling, my car was busy getting its sorry ass hauled off to the san fran impound lot. anybody who has ever had their car towed may be familiar with the fact that it is a pretty steep charge to get your vehicle back, and i’m also stuck with a parking ticket that was issued a few hours before the city finally brought a truck around and made off with my ride.

which sucks royal, because i’m already in negative dollar land. my financial situation currently is most shitty, which is partly due to my never quite recovering my finances from when ashley was visiting. that whole ordeal left me pretty much high and dry money wise, and it took me forever to get back at least some amount of emergency cash in my savings account, all of which is gone after several unexpected expenses a few months ago.

entirely my own fault, no argument there. economic suavness is definitely not my thing, and it’s really starting to catch up to me. while i might not be the best at dealing with money, life certainly does have a way of discovering all the most annoying expenses and piling them up for you at the worse possible moment. in addition to having to pay the good citizens of san francisco for having my car towed away (and having to walk across town to get it back), my car registration is due (have to pay off the ticket first), but i also have to get a smog check on my vehicle before i can get it registered, and before i can do that i have to get a tune-up since my gas mileage has become less than awful and i’m sure that my near dead spark plugs are going to net me a fail on the smog exam.

whatever. a couple people suggested that i setup a paypal account to help me out, since i am currently broker than the rudder on the titanic, but i’m not so sure how i feel about that. i leave it up to you, the readers (what few there may be that are even left), to decide whether that would be kosher or not. as well, i’ve also been taking stock of what i own that has any remaining value (very little) and figuring out what to sell of mine on eBay for some extra cash.

the annoying thing is i am poor despite the fact that i am actually still working, and quite a lot to boot. my paychecks for the last several rounds have pretty much already been spent before i even got the money (and not on things that i would have liked to spend it on), so i keep getting this sense that i’m not really moving forward at all in life. it’s a bit frustrating.

anyways. my body also has been quite mad at me lately, as i have been less then diligent in securing the required amount of sleep it desires. i’d say a few months ago, my body finally decided that i no longer can stay up for extremely long periods of time and still make a full recovery on minimal sleep. perhaps it is a sign that i am getting old. or older.

at any rate, there have been a couple weeks where i ended up sleeping for less than four or five hours for the entire seven days, which became a big concern amongst my family, friends and co-workers that i devote just a tad more of my time towards getting some rest. it’s been slow goings so far, since i’m not the best at managing my time. but i’m getting there.

so, there at least is an update for y’all. again, i have no idea how many people even bother to check this site anymore. it wouldn’t really surprise me if people stopped coming by quite a long time ago, seeing as how i certainly presented the illusion that i was gone from the world of blogging.

but i’m back, baby.


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